Todays Guitar Joke

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Todays Guitar Joke

Postby anniv 63 » Thu Mar 26, 2020 3:35 pm

A woman phones the police to report that her husband has been killed by a Jaguar.
Oh yes madam says the officer, can you give a description was it maybe a Mark 10 or an E type
or maybe an escaped animal from a zoo?
Oh no says the woman the B.st.rd bought another Fender so I walloped it over his head!!!

Mike
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Re: Todays Guitar Joke

Postby bazmusicman » Thu Mar 26, 2020 5:33 pm

Ha Ha.....just what's needed to cheer us up!
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Re: Todays Guitar Joke

Postby Stu's Dad » Thu Mar 26, 2020 9:30 pm

:lol: :lol: :crazy:
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Re: Todays Guitar Joke

Postby shadowriter » Fri Mar 27, 2020 9:11 am

Great stuff, keep em coming, makes the days a bit lighter.
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Re: Todays Guitar Joke

Postby Uncle Fiesta » Sat Mar 28, 2020 3:51 pm

Two women are sitting in a magistrate's court waiting for their cases to come up and get chatting:


"So what you in for?"

"I let my boyfriend's tyres down and when he drove off he had a nasty crash."

"Oh blimey."

"What about you then?"

"Oh, I broke my husband's guitars over his head."

"First offender?"

No, first a Gibson, then a Fender."
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Re: Todays Guitar Joke

Postby shadowriter » Mon Mar 30, 2020 12:51 pm

What do you say to a guitarist in a suit?

Will the defendant please rise.
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Re: Todays Guitar Joke

Postby abstamaria » Mon Mar 30, 2020 2:15 pm

How can you tell it’s the lead guitarist who’s at the door?

First, he can’t find the key.
Second, he doesn’t know when to come in.
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Re: Todays Guitar Joke

Postby Tone » Tue Mar 31, 2020 11:45 am

:D :D
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Re: Todays Guitar Joke

Postby shadowriter » Tue Mar 31, 2020 12:05 pm

abstamaria wrote:How can you tell it’s the lead guitarist who’s at the door?

First, he can’t find the key.
Second, he doesn’t know when to come in.

Loved this one, great stuff, keep em coming.
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Re: Todays Guitar Joke

Postby Uncle Fiesta » Sat Apr 04, 2020 2:38 pm

abstamaria wrote:How can you tell it’s the lead guitarist who’s at the door?

First, he can’t find the key.
Second, he doesn’t know when to come in.


No that's a singer.


Q - How do you get a lead guitarist to turn the volume down?

A - Put the sheet music in front of him.


And finally, a classical musician's joke:

Q - What's the difference between a guitar and a vacuum cleaner?

A - None, they both suck when you plug them in.
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